School's out for summer (to a rock n' roll beat)

Today was the last day for students. I am so very relieved. I can't even express how happy I am about this. I did cry when my kids were getting on the bus. This is the first time that I've ever cried. I've come close before but this is the first time for tears like this.

Last year was a really tough year and there was no love lost for that class. I really liked a few of my students and have been lucky enough to have them visit me this year. One of them scored the highest possible score on the writing section of her state mandated test. The only one in our school to do that. But it was still a very tough year and couldn't end soon enough for me.

The year before was a great class. The best that I've ever had. Easy assignment but the end of my work in Seattle. We moved not long after the end of school and it was a crazy time of packing and saying goodbye to everything that I knew and loved there.

Three years ago was very hard. It was the year that they closed down the school that I started teaching at. It had been a really rough school for several years and test scores were going down. We had just gotten a new principal and the school was turning around. The district decided to close the school down anyway. The teachers were very upset but we did a great job of making it sound like a wonderful opportunity for the children. We didn't want to upset them further. It was very hard but again there was a lot of moving and everyone was very busy.

I missed the last week of school my first year teaching because I was at my Grandfather's funeral. I did cry that week but it wasn't because of school.

Being a teacher is a difficult job for so many reasons. You've read many complaints that I've had throughout the the years. Each year a get a new batch of students and each year they leave me. Sometimes I'm very ready for them to leave and sometimes it really breaks my heart. Today I said goodbye to a student that really leaves me wanting more time with him.

He was not able to show that he learned a lot. He was in trouble almost everyday for his behavior. He will be in first grade again next year. With all of that, I wish I had more time. He is one that I would take home and keep as my own.

I walked him out for dismissal today. We held hands and before he got on the bus, I pulled him aside. I explained to him how I'm going to miss him and how I know that this year was very hard for him but I'm so proud of how hard he worked. I explained that although he is going to be in first grade again next year, he did not fail. He just needs more time. I told him how I know that he is a very smart boy and that we need to just keep working so he can show the world. He started to cry. He told me he loved me and got on the bus.

That's when the tears started falling.

Each year I get a new set of kids. Some are harder to say goodbye to.